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Stop Your Marriage from Being Gay

Congress apparently is in an ugly mood these days. There is a movement in the works that would create a constitutional amendment to block gay marriages. This is somewhat sad, since according to statistics, most US marriages are depressing, not gay. Apparently, Congress is very unhappy with its own marriages, and is now determined to put an end to any trace of a “gay” or “happy” marriage. “We owe it to the children,” a “family values” senator repeated as he stepped out from his favorite watering hole.

Congress actually needs to get straight with the American people. Many in Washington, DC are facing the possibility that their marriages could be interrupted for two to ten years (or more) and feel that the rest of the country should be forced to live in misery as well. Now, as the June wedding crunch begins, young people are wondering if they should even bother calling the wedding planner.

Here at X10, however, we say whether your marriage is gay or depressed, you might think about starting out by registering for our latest treasure chest that can give you guaranteed seconds of wedded bliss.
Say your other half doesn’t enjoy your Alvin and the Chipmunks mp3s you downloaded. All you have to do is take our Lola wireless and shoot those chipmunks down to the basement where you can listen in peace. Then there’s a pile of “Active Home” kits, including remotes that lets you walk out of a room AND turn off all the lights. A few days of this and your marriage will never be gay!
But be careful, eventually you’ll want to just dim the lights, kiss and makeup. Try to be quiet about it.
The government is watching.


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