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Light Up Your Credit Card, Get Control of Your Life

So many nights I sit by my window
Waiting for someone to sing me his song
So many dreams I kept deep inside me
Alone in the dark but now
You've come along

You light up my life
You give me hope
To carry on
You light up my days
and fill my nights with song

Despite the efforts of X10 to reproduce them by the thousands, the species lampus controlus suddenly became as rare as a discounted gallon of gas. The component that had launched its own love ballads worked only in its native environment, ready to have its inner circuits mounted by homo sapiens for electrifying action.

Scientists had observed the diminishing quantity of the lampus controlus, as they quietly took their place in a configuration more wired than a conference of Seattle computer scientists at Starbucks headquarters. Prong by prong, the individual modules learned their place securely fastened to an outlet they could ride until their rhythm of power was discharged.

Despite their constant networking, many of these controlling entities lost their charge somewhere between the Betamax and the Eight-Track Tape player. Still, scientists at X10 cloned more and more. As the species became rarer and rarer, naturally their value increased. At times the individual unit could fetch scores of dollars in the after market – a body of water known only as E-Bay.

What would become of this worthy species? Would they go the way of the Vacuum tube? Would they be replaced by some faceless dual-ported, 10-100 Ethernet card? Would the prong go the way of Pong?

Fortunately, X10 values its lampus controlus highly enough to devalue them. Somewhere in the X10 marketing department a bandit is on the loose, and he believes the species should return in its traditional glory. The only way to do that is to clone millions more, and practically give them away to good homes. Rumors abound that call center staff are running out of the building in sheer exhaustion as thousands of prospective adoptive parents for the newly coined components are getting change for the $10 bills they hand over.

Imagine lighting up your days, filling your nights with song and change for a ten-spot.

What more could you ask?


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